Living Broken Girl
by GothicLolita009 aka Hayley M
Summary: AU set about twelve to fifteen years after Deathly Hallows. Severus Snape becomes entangled with a girl of fifteen who is the bearer of a dark secret...WARNING: There are allusions some adult-type situations, though not described.
1. Prologue: Just Alice

Living Broken Girl

By: GothicLolita009, aka Haley Macrae

Rating: PG

Synopsis: AU, set up about 12 years after the events of DH. During a brief break in the school year, Severus Snape and his wife take in a child of fifteen who is filled with secrets. Also set at the end of events of a little read called, 'Living Dead Girl,' by Elizabeth Scott. This plot bunny wouldn't leave me alone after I read the book, so here goes. WARNING: There is some suggested abuse. If you don't like this please stop reading now.

Disclaimer: All characters, places, etc. belong to Warner Brothers, J.K. Rowling, Elizabeth Scott, and whoever else. They are all being used without permission and without intent to copyright. Please don't sue me! A special thanks to my beta, and best friend, MadameSnapeRhapsody.

A/N: Hello again to my readers! I am really sorry to keep you guys waiting so long for something new from me! m-_-m (bow). Please enjoy this little piece while Black Butler, Dark Wizard takes an hiatus.

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Prologue: Just Alice

I have been called Alice for as long as I can remember. I was reborn as her that night Ray took me and showed me what he liked and didn't like, and that he would punish me if I wasn't good.

I tried counting off the days in my head at first, but I ended up losing count.

Then Ray asked me to find him another.

She would become the new me. The new Alice.

I found her, but she had a brother and there were cops and that would make things hard. Ray wanted things to be quiet when he took her.

The day before we were going to take her, _she_ came into the park.

I was not supposed to be noticed, but she seemed to notice me right away after I left the car that Jake came to get his little sister in; the new me that Ray had named Annabel.

The woman was small, with a face that looked way more innocent than mine, and yet somehow she seemed older, so much older than me.

I could see she had known a lot of pain, too.

Her clothes were a little strange; puffy-sleeved poet shirt, a Victorian corset and simple blue jeans. She looked over at me, smiled, and waved to me.

I found myself waving back. My feet are headed toward her, even though I know I need to catch the bus and Ray will be angry if he finds out I was talking to someone he doesn't know.

"Hello," she says, going into a bag I didn't see at first. She pulls out something wrapped in wax paper, and my mouth waters at the sight.

It's a sandwich.

"You look hungry," she says with that same warm smile and knowing eyes that are like the sea, "would you like this? I really can't eat all this food I packed on my own."

Her voice is warm and musical, and I imagine she would be a good singer on the choir at church. She is holding out the sandwich to me now, and I reach out warily, but when she doesn't pull it away I take it and unwrap it, scarfing it down.

"Thank you," I mumble.

"Do you live around here? Do you have a home?" she asks, eying me curiously, like she wants me to open to her and tell her everything that's happened to me.

And I want to. The part of me that doesn't matter if I live or if I die comes out, wanting to throw myself at her mercy and tell her everything that has happened to me.

But then I remember 623 Daisy Lane, and what will happen to everyone there if I'm not good like Ray says to be. I look at the ground, shaking my head.

A deep voice then calls, "Mika, what are you doing? Reconnoitering with the wastrels again? Honestly, all the meek of the Earth are your responsibility."

My head snaps up to see the man who has spoken. He is tall, much taller than she, and doesn't look at all friendly with his black hair that looks like mine after about three days. His eyes are like onyx, cold and uninviting, and he looks at me like I was bad, like I did something wrong.

I start to shuffle away while I hear her saying, "Severus, really—you don't know that little girl's story anymore than me."

Little Girl.

I was a little girl. Once.

Now I am just Alice.


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Ray is angry at me for being late. Not something I was surprised at.

"I've told you what happens to naughty girls, didn't I Alice?" he snaps angrily, the hand at my throat causing me to cough and sputter.

I wish he would just end it for me, but I manage to tell him that Jake will be there with his car tomorrow, to pick up Annabel, and that the plan is going to work. That it has to work.

Ray lets me go, and begins to lay out maps and plans while I scoop out the yoghurt from the plastic container with my fingers. The remains of dinner...or maybe lunch. I don't remember anymore.

Later that night, the TV is still going and Ray pulls me into his lap.

"Show me, Alice," he says huskily, reeking of filth, "show me how much you love me."

I do.

The next day in the park, Annabel is not there, nor is Jake, and when I arrive Ray is talking with the lady called Mika I had seen yesterday. The black-haired man she called Severus doesn't seem to be around either, which will make Ray happy.

I go over to Ray like an obedient girl, his girl, his little Alice, and he smiles at me. Mika looks at the two of us as if she can see something neither of us can, like she knows we're wrong somehow, as Ray goes on about his "daughter" and how she needs someone to take care of her, how much he loves her.

Mika isn't taken in, Mika isn't fooled, Mika is not like other people. Mika, Mika, Mika.

"Say hello, darling," says Ray, and I mumble a hello.

It's now 6:03 PM.

"Go play, Alice, says Ray, shoving me in the direction of Annabel, "now."

With a mumbled, "Excuse me," I go off in Annabel's direction.

I find Annabel by the swings, just where I knew she would be. I know what he wants me to do, distract her, corner her, so he can take her. Take her and remake her into what I am now.

If I let him, there won't be a happy ending for her, either.

My heart is throbbing as Annabel sees me, what her world soon will be.

I have a choice. Do I let Ray take her and remake her? Do I give her the chance I never had?

"Run," I say.

I give her the chance.

Like a stupid, dumb animal, like that once upon a time girl I used to be, she just stands there. Part of me thinks she deserves it as Ray comes over, firm hand on her arm.

She screams.

Why hadn't I thought to scream, I wonder as she screams again. There's a sudden flash like a lightning strike from the left, something hits Ray and he is on the ground, groaning and bleeding and calling out for me. I do not, or maybe I can't, move to help him.

"Run!" I scream at her again, and little Annabel runs. She will never be Annabel, she will always be Lucy and she will want to be Lucy and never forget how she almost became Annabel. She will not become another me.

"You filthy, stinking, dirty, lowlife scum of the Earth," I hear someone say, their voice seething with the anger that's in Ray's sometimes, "killing isn't good enough for you."

It is Mika. She has a stick in her hand and putting her hand on my shoulder and leading me away with gentle words and her hands are gentle as she turns me away from the scene.

I hear the sirens, but Mika is leading me away, far away, ignoring the wails and the cries of the little girl who was almost me as she tells them what happened. As if they'd believe her, the pathetic little thing.

Severus is waiting for her on the corner. He looks angry, even more angry than yesterday as he looks to me and then to her.

"Care to explain?" he asks, sounding half-annoyed and bored at the same time. Mika leans in close and speaks softly into his ear, greasy black hair that matches his black clothing falling so I cannot read their lips.

Finally, he turns to me with a look that isn't so angry, then to her. Without another word, he walks away.

"Come along, sweetheart," coaxes Mika gently, "we're going to take you home with us. Just for a little while—all right?"

One would be worse than two, and I want to take a lesson from Lucy, start screaming or step on Mika's foot and run away. I still have the money in my pocket and I might be able to get to 623 Daisy Lane with it, get everyone out before-

"He'll kill them!" I say suddenly in a blind panic.

"Kill who, sweetheart?" says Mika, dropping to one knee and looking up at me with genuine concern, real worry in her eyes and in her face.

"Mika!" calls Severus again, from the next corner, "it would be better if we made ourselves scarce now."

"Mom," I say suddenly, "Mom and Dad. Their names are Helen and Glenn and he will kill them because I ran away. He will kill them."

"Not if I have anything to say about it," says Mika firmly, "from here out, little one, you must trust me—and you must trust Severus. Do you understand?"

I nod.

"I will. I trust you," I say.

And I do. Somehow I do.

Mika holds my hand and speaks softly to me as we weave through traffic to a street which hugs the nearby river. Severus arrives at the door of a tenement house like any other in the run-down part of town, opening the door and bustling us inside.

The house smells old and musty and there are a lot of books on the shelves of the room just off the hall. Mika leads us in the direction of the other room, the one of the right, and gently sits me down.

"That's better," says Mika, shedding a layer of clothing and kneeling in front of the plush chair near the empty grate which holds me.

"Now, sweetie," she says, "can you tell me your name? I mean, your real name?"

"Kyra," I say, feeling a click inside me, "Kyra Davis and I live at 623 Daisy Lane and I'd like to go home. May I go home, please? Will you take me there?"

Suddenly, I feel small and vulnerable, like a child. But I am not a child anymore.

"Yes," says Mika softly, gently pushing a strand of hair out of my eyes, "but not just yet, sweetheart. We have to make sure your home is safe before we take you back there. You understand right? You said yourself what would happen."

I nod. I remember what Ray said he would do, and I wonder if he is making plans now, getting a sharp knife and a gun and getting on the highway toward 623 Daisy Lane. If he survived.

Mika gives me a smile before going into the kitchen. I hear her speaking into a telephone.

But then I start. Like a shadow, Severus is standing in front of me, a small basket in hand, looking at me—through me, even.

"Do not be scared," he says, his tone more gentle than I have heard it, up until now, "I observe you've suffered some—unpleasant injuries. I can assist you, if you wish."

He holds out a hand, looking almost bored, but waiting for me to accept the help he is offering. It is something new to me, this permission being asked to touch me.

I give him my hand, and he begins spreading stuff that smells bad on my cuts, twisting gauze around them, waving a hand over my bruises. They are gone in a flash. He looks up at me and he moves down my legs. It is different than being touched by Ray. No hurry, no dirtiness in his hands...only the gentle skill of someone who has done this before.

"Now," he says, "with your permission, I should like to examine the rest of you. Of course, you may remain modest."

Again, asking for permission. I stand almost automatically, removing the too tight, too short clothes, but I leave my underthings on like Severus said I could. He is quiet when he sees the bruise on my chest, the cuts on my body. He spreads more of the bad-smelling stuff on me.

"It is a poultice—a mixture of herbs and oil, to aid in healing," he explains as he finishes putting the last bandage in place.

From the basket, he then takes some clothes, offering them to me.

"I suppose," he says as he holds them out, "you would wish to wear something that is more—shall we say—appropriate?"

I take the clothes with a nod of thanks, and Severus quickly leaves the room, the door slamming shut.

I wonder what I did to make him dislike me.


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The new jeans are soft and supple, as if someone had worn them for a long time and they molded to the person. The shirt is a little big, but it's a nice shade of green and it's comfortable. I look over at the one shelf of books, eying the titles on their spines as the door softly opens. Snapping my head around, I turn to see Mika, leaving the door open as she enters.

"You don't need to worry Kyra," she says as she comes over to me, "they took him away to hospital, and the police are watching him now. The police in your town are on their way to warn your parents. Tomorrow a person called Detective Lestrade is coming here to see you, but we will be right nearby to help you."

"When may I go home?" I ask again.

"Well," says Mika, taking a chair near me, "for the moment, I would like you to stay here, sweetheart. I want to feed you and give you a bath and some clothes and then I will give you back to your parents. Would that be all right with you?"

Food. I realize how hungry I am.

"Yes," I say, "Yes. I want food."

Mika smiles, laughing a little at my ravenous look.

"Right," she says, offering me her hand, "let's get you something to eat."

Mika starts me off with chicken broth, warning me not to eat too fast, or I would get a stomach ache.

The broth is salty and warm and it tastes better than anything I have had in ages. Mika gives me bread to soak up every last drop, dripping with sweet butter that tastes flavored with honey.

When I have eaten, Severus comes into the room, bearing a scary-looking silver goblet.

"Drink this," he says softly, putting the goblet on the table next to my glass of milk, "it is a potion which will help you to sleep without dreams."

I look at the goblet, and look at him. He does not begin to snap at me, tell me I am being bad and I should just do what he says.

He is scary like Ray, but he is not Ray.

Severus is not going to hurt me. He is not going to make show him anything. Not that I didn't show him a lot earlier, but I think I know now why he left so fast.

Maybe he didn't want to see me like that.

Are there men like that still? The ones who don't care about how much you love them or what they can do with you?

Severus doesn't care if I don't love him, and he won't ever care.

But he does care. He cares about me, and maybe it's because Mika's making him, but he does care.

So I take the goblet, drinking it down in one gulp. There wasn't as much in there as it looked to be.

I feel a pair of strong, black-clad arms carry me up the stairs.

*As a reminder, reviews are always welcome! *points to the little review button* If you'd like to leave some input about how the story should continue, please do so! We welcome all constructive criticism.*


	4. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 

I wake up feeling light. I don't wake up with a drunkard on top of my chest. I don't smell grimy or anything like Ray. Instead, I wake smelling of fresh, clean linens.

The room I am in is small, just big enough for a bed and a desk and a small closet filled with clothes. Curtained windows reveal the street below. People are coming and going in the early-morning fog and they look busy.

There is no clock in the room. It's as if time has stopped for me again, like it did that day when Ray took me. 

I am wearing the same clothes from yesterday, not even rumpled. I suppose that whatever potion Severus gave me last night worked; I had slept, and slept well.

Tapping on the door brings me out from myself and back into the world. This world is okay now...though all the talk shows say I ought to be afraid. I ought to worry what happened will happen again. Here.

Somehow I know it won't. Ever. 

"Kyra—breakfast." Severus' voice, calling easily from the other side of the door.

I straighten my greasy dark hair, and go down. 

A bowl of porridge sits at the table where I was last night. Mika is at the old-fashioned stove, and I can hear the sizzle and smell the frying bacon and eggs.

"Good morning," says Mika, turning from the pans to look at me. Her face is as warm and welcome as it was when I met her. Severus is seated at the table, nibbling at a piece of buttered toast. He looked over his morning paper at me, and I thought I saw some of the photographs move. 

"Good morning," he says, not smiling but looking over at me when I sit down, as if sizing me up.

I'm not as strong as I was...I don't pretend to be. I haven't been for a long time. Can you see that, Severus? 

"Let's see how you do with the porridge," says Mika as she continues her work, "but I think you can handle some more." 

I pick up the spoon, adding a little milk to the thick stuff in my bowl and gobbling it down. 

From my right, I hear a sigh. "Unless you wish to choke yourself with the spoon, I suggest you proceed in a less—hurried manner," I hear Severus say, "or the consequence will be—regrettable." 

He is not snapping at me, not calling me fat cow or dumb fat whore or anything Ray would call me. I sneak a look up at him; he is looking at me with a touch of annoyance but concern too. He is not eying me like I am something he wants to eat. I am—Kyra-to him. Not his precious possession—just Kyra. 

He is not looking at me like he wants to re-make me. He is looking at me like I make him remember someone, someone that might be like me now.

Or maybe not.

I do not realize that I finished the porridge until my spoon goes into the bowl and there is no more there. 

Mika gently chuckles at me, takes the bowl away, and puts a plate in front of me. It's heaped high with bacon and scrambled eggs and hot, fresh scones that just want clotted cream. 

"Eat up, sweetheart," she says as she puts my bowl into the sink, "Detective Lestrade is going to be here later, and we should try to get you cleaned up before he gets here." 

I finish my breakfast slowly. 

From there, as I stand to take my plate to the sink, Mika watches me, eying me critically, as if she too is sizing me up.

She holds out her hand for the plate and cup, adding them to the sink. Taking out her long stick from yesterday she murmurs, "Scourgify," and the sink comes to life. 

"Come along then, sweetheart," she says without missing a beat, "let's get you a bath, shall we?"

Mika leads me back upstairs to my room, where a soft blue robe is waiting for me. I slip out of my clothes and into the robe, hearing the running water down the hall. I follow it's noise, seeing that Mika has put on an apron. She adds a lot of bubbles to the bath, smiling up at me.

"It's all ready," she says, "um..did you want me to stay and help you? We'll have to re-do those bandages." 

For the first time since she brought me to her home, she looks a little uncertain. 

"Sure," I say, taking off my robe, "I'd like that." 

As gently as she can, Mika removes the dressings, saying nothing out loud, but as I look at her face she looks as if she will cry.

Don't cry for me, Mika; I stopped crying for me a long time ago.

Mika scrubs me all over, being very gentle, like she's afraid I might break. Like I'm not already broken.

I am very broken. I've been smashed and broken and re-made and I don't know if I will ever be whole again.

Once I am clean, she dries me off and brings in more of the poultice, spreading it on my cuts, wrapping them up with bandages.

"How did you do that?" I ask her softly, mumbling. Ray always said children needed to be seen and not heard. 

"Sorry?" asks Mika, looking up at me. 

"In the kitchen...how did you do that?"

My voice is louder this time. I am not quite to afraid to be heard now. 

"Oh," says Mika, and laughs a little. I like her laugh. 

"What I did," she says as she hands a pile of clothing to me, "that was magic. I found out when I was little I had it, and I went to a special school, and there I met my husband and we had a long journey together and...well, here we stand." 

I listen to her as I dress in clean clothes. Mika takes the others, tossing them into the hamper. 

"Right," she says, "now let's get your hair combed out. Severus told me Detective Lestrade is on his way."


	5. Chapter 4

A/N: Hello, everyone. I just wanted to thank you all for the feedback. Please keep it coming!

I am working on some HP one-shots, as well as two longer novels. Please look forward to them! One is in the works to primere on the 1st of September, the other on January 9th, which is of course Severus Snape's birthday!

Chapter 4

Mika combs out my long dark hair, humming a bouncy tune as she passes the teeth gently through each tangle. My mind wanders over what will become of me now as she does this.

This feeling, bubbling up inside of me...what is it?

Joy? Love? Anger? Hate?

Yes. Joy. I think it's joy. Mika must feel it too, judging by her humming.

It's beyond my understanding, the joy that she seems to feel in looking after me. I'm a little broken thing. How and why do I make her happy?

Mika might be one of those people who like broken things. I have to keep telling myself I cannot be fixed.

The door below opens, closes.

"Mika! Kyra! He's here," calls Severus, his voice carrying effortlessly to us above. I never really thought about how easy that normally quiet, deep voice drifts upward.

"Right," says Mika, giving me a sincere but nervous smile, "ready then, Kyra sweetheart?" 

I nod. I suppose I am as ready for this as I am anything. 

Lestrade is waiting. A pair of doors I don't remember close in the sitting room after we enter, shutting out Severus from the conversation. It is only me, Mika, and Detective Lestrade. I wonder if Severus' exclusion is by his choice or Mika's.

"Now then, Miss Davis," he says, drawing out a small notebook like on the TV shows, "please give me your full name and address."

I do, trying to make myself sound confident. Ray had me trained well. I had none when he had me...just the routine.

Through the afternoon, Mika does not leave my side as I recount my time with Ray. She suggests a break one time, going into the kitchen to make tea.

She didn't see me follow her, and she didn't know I watched her as she boiled the water. I watched her in confusion as she slumped over the counter, her shoulders beginning to shake, sobs racking her body.

Why was she crying? I am a broken, unfixable thing, of no consquence. I do not deserve her pure tears. Couldn't she see these things?

After a few moments, she splashed some water on her face just as the kettle began to boil. Drying her face with a towel, she arranges the things on the tea tray, bringing it in.

I am back in my chair like I never followed her when she returns. Lestrade had said nothing, assuming perhaps I was going to help with the tea. Well, let him. What happened in the kitchen was none of his business anyway. I had learned stealth and cunning; they became my friends. 

Lestrade asks me a few more questions, and I answer them. Then he turns to Mika, asking her some of the same things. She answers prettily, calmly, like she is in pain somehow. We sit calmly over cups of tea for a moment, silent, absorbing what we have seen and heard.

Finally, Lestrade rises, saying that for the moment, the courts have no reason to remove me from my "current residence," and Mika perks up a little, her eyes brighten. However, Mr. and Mrs. Davis will be arriving tomorrow, and they want to see me. 

I don't know if I can see them. I don't know if I want to. Do I even care about seeing them?

Mika goes with Lestrade to the door, bidding him a respectful farewell with the a customary bow. She is small, like a small doll. Asian, I realize with a flash.

Later that night, at dinner, Severus comes out from his study, carrying another goblet.

He does not need to tell me what I should do. I drink it. I sort of want to dream tonight, but it doesn't smell as strong as last night, so maybe I will anyway.

Later, as I go up to bed, I see Mika, taking a plate to the study and tapping on the door.


End file.
